Tag Archives: sarcasm alert

I’m tired of all these special snowflakes

Yeah, that’s right: I’m sick, absolutely sick, of all these special snowflakes who think they’re omniscient.  They think they know everything — literally everything, even what’s going on in your head right now, every emotion you feel, every sensation or attraction you experience, everything.  I mean, it’s one thing to consider yourself knowledgeable, but this is taking things way too far.

Special snowflakes have this compulsion where, if you describe your internal experiences, they’ll pounce on you to say you’re lying and just attempting to make yourself seem more unique than you really are, because these special snowflakes are the ones who know what you’re really like, of course.  How do they know?  Well we’re just supposed to take their word for it.  Why wouldn’t you believe them, right?  They can see inside your brain or something, probably.  Mind-readers.  It’s a wonder they haven’t hacked everybody’s accounts by now, since they must know all existing passwords, too.

Nothing in the world exists that they haven’t already heard of before, after all.  They’re too special to need to learn things.  They’re so special, they’ve already collected every datapoint in existence.  Yep.  These kids know everything, and asking questions would be beneath them.  Don’t ask where they got these wild magic powers from — they just know things, and they will be furious if you question that.

There’s nothing too implausible about a bunch of people claiming to have unlimited godlike omniscience out of the blue, right?  That’s not too ridiculous or anything.  Nah.  These firm but benevolent shepherds are the true arbiters of what’s really ridiculous here.

Ugh.  Special snowflakes.

What do we need a word like “semi-arid” for?

There’s no such thing as “semi-arid”.  You’re either arid or you’re not.  You either get less than ten inches of annual rainfall or you don’t.  The definition of semi-arid isn’t even specific — it’s just a gray area between desert climates and humid climates.  With a definition that vague, it can be used to classify any humid climate that’s not an absolute rainforest, so what’s the point?  Semi-arid climates are not desertsStop calling them that. 

This is ridiculous.  Just because you don’t get rain 24/7 doesn’t mean you’re arid.  Climates that classify themselves as semi-arid are just humid climates being misled or trying to be different so they can fit in with the arid ones, even though they don’t belong.  Stop lumping them in together.  Semi-aridness is just a fad, and an annoying one at that.  People need to stop acting like it’s real or else it’s going to make everyone stop taking arid climates seriously.

a photo of dry scrub and spiky plants with a mesa in the distance

Just look at all that temperate forestland trying to be special.

Also, we have definite, rumor-based proof that the word “semi-arid” was made up by [insert name of group associated with low credibility].  Or at least, it probably was, anyway, because I’ve seen them using it and it just seems like something they’d do.

This has been a PSA: “semi-arid” is just a fake classification made up by people who want humid climates to get counted as arid.