Tag Archives: coming out

Royal Bad Ace Fairy

Meant to have these finished a million years ago, before my laptop died and I lost all my files for a while…

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“No Matter What”

I had to tell my grandfather something I knew he didn’t want to hear yesterday: I’m not going to see him this Christmas.  I’m still not sure whether it was the right decision.

I expected him to respond with hurt and confusion, and he sort of did, in his own way, but he also caught me off guard by telling me the same thing he’s told me many times before — that he loves me, and will always love me, no matter what.  That was his way of responding.  By emphasizing that, over and over.

He’s told me that for as long as I’ve known him, and when I was little, I just took it for granted that my grandparents love me.  The sky is blue, peas are gross, and my grandparents love me.  I actually didn’t understand why Granddad emphasized it so much — that he loves me and will always love me, no matter what.  It seemed almost random sometimes, but I just accepted it as a thing he liked to say.

But ever since I realized what I am (i.e. not straight), it’s started to make me feel queasy when he says it.

Because, yes, he loves me.  But this is my Catholic, Republican, Fox-News-watching grandfather we’re talking about here.

And so I’m left wondering, these days, when he says he loves me no matter what…  Would you still?  If you knew?

And.  God.  I don’t even know how to put a name to that emotion.

He says “no matter what,” but it’s not as easy to believe that anymore.

the TMI hangup

A short post about (not) coming out.

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[disordered eating tw]

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school stuff

A post with more regular day-in-the-life stories.  Just to give y’all another breather from this blog’s more cataclysmic things.

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Wearing Your Orientation on Your Sleeve

Today I wore the shirt I bought from One Percent World‘s redbubble account — the “Kinsey X” shirt, in purple — and I’d worn it a few times before, so it didn’t occur to me that this was the first time that some of my family members had seen it. Continue reading

Not A Complete Disaster

Personal story time.

The other day, I brought up my orientation to a new person, and it… could have gone worse, though I wasn’t left feeling very good about it.  Continue reading

Coming Out Experiences

I don’t know of how much interest it is to anyone, but this should give my personal posts a little more context, for what it’s worth. Continue reading