AA: “I am trying to be as careful as possible…”

You know, as much as I don’t actually regret writing that “what to do if you think your partner might be asexual” post (because I think the world needs it), it does seem to be, simultaneously, 1) the reason for getting a lot of messages in my askbox all like “I want to confront my boyfriend because I think he’s asexual, what do you think my approach should be” and yet, at the same time, 2) it’s also a post that these people do not actually seem to have read.

Anyway I normally give detailed responses to these things but I rarely get any indication that the intended people read them and my patience wears thin over the years, so… I have no advice for you until you go and actually read the original post.


Academics sure are bad at talking about abstinence, huh

lol nothing like a little academic reading on “purity culture” to reopen some old baggage

[cn: conservative Christian talk, anti-ace stuff, discussion of rape (fictional and political)]

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Where did this “gray-asexual flag” come from?

Let me walk you through this series of events: I visited Rowan’s and Queenie’s blog and saw these two posts within a short timeframe of each other, so I thought, oh, looks like Redbeard’s been making graphics, I wonder what else he’s uploaded lately. Turns out: animated flags. Flags which I mostly recognized, except for… one, labeled as a “gray-asexual flag.”

What?

For your convenience, I’ll skip over the “I thought gray-aces already had a flag” reaction and jump straight to these other parts:

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Asexual academic articles?

This seems like a good place to ask: if someone were writing a rhetorical studies article on (perceptions of) asexuality, do you know of any academic work you would expect to see cited? –or think it’s important to have read? Not necessarily the definitional “what is asexuality, who are asexuals” type of thing, but more in relation to broader culture or other subcultures. I know there are a few pages out there with asexuality bibliographies and such, but I’m not assuming that stuff’s up to date.


Right doesn’t equal sexy.

There’s already a lot of debate around the ethics of engaging with (and, specifically, enjoying) unethical pieces of media (…however that might be defined). This isn’t about that so much.

This post is about the opposite.

Content Notes: sexuality and porn talk (non-explicit); morality & pleasure talk, including possible scrupulosity triggers.

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AA: Married 14 Years

Summer wrote in on April 25th:

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2017-2018

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ftr: on certain popular ace character interpretations

Still can’t brain enough for any of the full posts I want to do but I hope everybody realizes that the “people interpreting a character like BBC Sherlock as ace” phenomenon and the “people responding to asexual identity with ‘what, you think you’re better than us?'” phenomenon have something to do with each other.


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Can’t do either of the posts I have in mind for this blog OR get any of my reading or other work done right now because I’m listless and tired and mad at a professor and can’t focus on anything long enough.


Announcement for Vesper

In one of my classes, we’re on the unit on Foucault, and now every time I see/hear the words “Visibility is a trap,” I think of you.