Category Archives: Asexuality & Religion

Takeaways from conservative Christian sex manuals

[cw: sex-normativity, misogyny, rape culture]

It is through sexual union that people feel closest to Christ. Not only does God reveal himself in sexual love, but, as one book poetically argues, the only way mortals can find Christ is in the marital act, which is the holiest of acts. In this sense, the marital union is seen as a profound prayer, as “no human activity gives more glory to man’s creator than the act by which man is permitted to share in creation.” […]

Husbands and wives are obligated to honor each other’s sexual needs for “it is God’s will that married people enjoy sexual relations.” Abstinence from sex is allowed only under specific conditions, by mutual agreement, and temporarily. […]

The two principal types of sexual maladjustment cited in the manuals are frigidity on the part of the wife and premature ejaculation on the part of the husband. According to one book, “sexual frigidity is without doubt the greatest sexual problem threatening contemporary marriages. It is not an exaggeration to say that the majority of modern wives are, in some degree, frigid!” These authors are pessimistic regarding the transformation of cold into passionate wives. “There are frigid women, many of them, and the most skilled lovers would be powerless to ‘cure’ them.”

Lionel S. Lewis and Dennis D. Brissett, “Sex as God’s Work”

Nothing to say here that I haven’t said already.

Thanks again to Kristiny for the link.


nsfw nsfw nsfw

Highlights from Evangelical Christian sex manuals, taken from Lewis and Brissett’s article:

  • Christians Have More Sex
  • Christians Have Better Sex
  • Christian Women Have More Orgasms
  • Having Sex is a Way of Worshiping God
  • The Bible Says Thou Shalt Use Foreplay
  • For Best Results, Pray Before Sex
  • Please Be Hygienic
  • Have You Considered Buying Your Pastor and His Wife a Vibrator?
  • Try Curing Impotence with Prayer
  • Remember to Have Fun!

Aces in the Church

aces in the church cover

Too often, non-aces will speculate about what it’s like to be ace under the gaze of one of the most politically powerful religious groups to date, making assumptions about what we do or don’t face, without asking those of us who have the relevant experience.  This zine, “Aces in the Church,” was created to be a compilation of ace experiences with & within Christianity, to bring our stories together into one place and close the door on any need for speculation.

Big thanks to everyone who contributed.  “Aces in the Church,” a small digital zine edited by yours truly, is now available to read.  Links for view/download: wordpress, sendspace, google drive


Reminder: Submission Deadline

call for submissions

Reminder to submit a reflection piece to the Aces in the Church zine by August 15, 2016!

You can find all the criteria, rules, and premise details at the original call for submissions.  Send in your contributions either by email (theacetheist @ gmail.com) or through my askbox!  Be sure and check the call for submissions post if you’re not sure whether you’re invited to participate.

The reasoning behind the zine, as I explained before:

Too often, non-aces will speculate about what it’s like to be ace under the gaze of one of the most politically powerful religious groups to date, making assumptions about what we do or don’t face, without asking those of us who have the relevant experience.  This zine, “Aces in the Church,” is intended to be a compilation of ace experiences with & within Christianity, to bring our stories together into one place and close the door on any need for speculation.

I’ve already received a diversity of responses, and I’d love to see more!


cheat code

[cw: contentious ace stuff, Christian dialect (sin talk) ]

Continue reading


Call for Zine Submissions

call for submissions

Aces in the Church: a zine from under the asexual umbrella about experiences with(in) modern Christianity

CALL FOR SUBMISSIONS

Too often, non-aces will speculate about what it’s like to be ace under the gaze of one of the most politically powerful religious groups to date, making assumptions about what we do or don’t face, without asking those of us who have the relevant experience.  This zine, “Aces in the Church,” is intended to be a compilation of ace experiences with & within Christianity, to bring our stories together into one place and close the door on any need for speculation.

Who can submit content?

Anyone who fits both criteria:

  • past or present identification with asexuality, gray-asexuality, or some other identity under the asexual umbrella (questioning people welcome)
  • past or present participation in/involvement with/exposure to a Christian church or community (or Christian and Christian-leaning individuals)

If you’re interested but you’re on the fence about whether you or your experiences count, you are invited to submit something anyway.

What content can you submit?

Any personal reflections, mini essays, vignettes, stories, short comics, or other works dealing with being ace while engaging with Christians and/or in relation to Christianity.  For example, you might submit something about:

  • messages from within the Church about marriage and sexuality & how they’ve impacted you
  • abstinence-only sex education as experienced by an ace
  • how a Christian upbringing has affected the way you or others feel about the legitimacy of your ace identity
  • a time when you disclosed an ace identity, lack of interest in sex, etc., to a Christian
  • consequences to not believing in Christianity and consequences to not expressing sexual desire
  • parental expectations with regard to sex and God
  • dating (or not) as a Christian and an ace
  • interplay between religious and sexual trauma
  • things you would tell your younger, more devout (or less devout) self about attraction, dogma, and community
  • positive experiences of explicit ace acceptance in a Christian context

There is no minimum length requirement.  A couple of sentences is fine.  A short note saying that the subject is too difficult for you to talk about can count as a contribution.

All submissions will be subject to the editor’s approval prior to publication.  Pieces with objectionable content, such as antigay sentiment, will not be tolerated.  You can opt to supply a contact method if you would like to resolve any issues that may arise.

The editor will add content warnings at its own discretion, and you are welcome to specify some yourself.  There is only one mandatory rule about this: please place a note at the top if your submission includes sexual content.

How can I submit something?

You have two options!  Either drop the full text into Coyote’s askbox, or email the file/document to theacetheist@gmail.com, with the subject line “zine submission.”  These methods can also be used to send questions about the zine, but in that case, make sure to include a contact method for the reply, unless you’re a regular reader of The Ace Theist.

Please specify what name (if any) you would like the piece to be attributed to for the byline.  In other words, please say who your submission is from.  Your submission can be from “Anonymous.”  If you choose not to remain anonymous, you may use an alias or a url, or both.

When is the deadline?

The current deadline is August 15, but that’s subject to change depending on the response rate.  Feel free to drop Coyote a note to request more time.

[note for people who don’t read the tags: full text copying of this post is permitted & encouraged so this will spread]


hmmm

Even though I know 0 things about online zine making, I’ve been, ehh, thinking about putting one together about aces’ past and present experiences with Christianity — because lately I’ve seen some more comments around saying “aces have it okay because churchfolk love celibacy.”  And… I do have that religion & asexuality overview post that says otherwise, but I like the idea of putting out a call for more writing and having it bundled in one document, rather than depending on links.  ‘Cause as much as I love linkspams… tumblr urls are ephemeral.  And this seems like the more fitting option for what I have in mind.

So… interest check for just my readers rn.  Might write up a more formal description depending.


but speaking of which

I think that’s actually a good comparison for lackluster ace “resource” blogs, whose mods appear to prioritize spreading the Good News of “asexuality is legit” and that’s about the long and the short of it, like Christians who are invested in spreading the Good News of “Jesus is Christ” but aren’t really invested in getting into the material applications of that viewpoint, like, say, the redistribution of wealth and the elimination of poverty.

What I’m saying is that a lot of designated ace blogs (meaning, ace generalist blogs, not personal blogs of aces) don’t do much in the way of useful work, organizing, or resource creation.  And that’s lamentable.

[hypothetical examples of what I mean]


“stretch” more

Continue reading


…how…

tfw you’re browing a Christian tumblr blog and you glance at the source of a post and it’s from tumblr user fatherangel.