Author Archives: Coyote

Attraction-Based Essentialism

What is “attraction-based essentialism,” or even “essentialism,” for that matter? Here’s your handy reference post to explain. I’ve proposed and discussed these ideas before on Pillowfort [DW backup], but after a recent Carnival of Aros post, I realized it would be good to port this idea to WordPress as well.

[Preview image Apothecary Jars by Kato, licensed under CC BY-NC-ND 2.0.]

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Gray-Asexuality in Asexuality Studies

The field of asexuality studies* has grown a lot over the past decade, but generally the gray-asexual part of the umbrella receives minimal attention. Here I’ve compiled a sample of what that attention tends to look like. Note that most of these pieces have been covered by the Ace Journal Club, which provides a write-up with a summary and some notes, so I have included links to AJC posts where applicable.

[Crossposted to Pillowfort. Preview image by Steve Johnson, licensed under CC BY 2.0.]

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Reflections on Jason Voorhees, Virginity in Horror, and the Specter of the Anti-Sex Killer

So yes—in one version of the story, “prude” is synonym for sadist.

—Cameron Awkward-Rich, “A Prude’s Manifesto”

In popular culture, the slasher genre is known for killing off anyone who has sex, and many a slasher movie—including genre codifier Friday the 13th—has been interpreted as a conservative, anti-sex morality tract. But how much do these interpretations hold up under scrutiny? The answer is… complicated. What interests me about these films, though, isn’t as much the films themselves as the way that certain interpretations of them have been taken up in popular culture, imagining the survivors as always virginal and the killers as punitive avatars of anti-sexuality.

In order to dig into these perceptions, I’ve chosen to focus on the Friday the 13th franchise, best known for the hockey mask-wearing Jason Voorhees. The Friday movies are salient here not just for their immense influence and popularity, but also because Jason’s backstory readily lends itself to moralizing about irresponsible sex. So if there were ever an anti-sex killer, you’d think it would be Jason.

[Crossposted to Pillowfort.]

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On saying “before there was a separate aro community”

Sometimes, in situations concerning QPR misinformation, I’ve noticed people will talk about that term as having been created “before there was a separate aro community.” Positioning it that way interests me because, well… how do we draw that line, exactly? I don’t have a concrete answer, but long story short, it’s gotten me thinking about how the aro community talks about itself and its history.

[Crossposted to Pillowfort. Preview image created using Arrow Tips by Don and Janet, licensed under CC BY-SA 2.0.]

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I want to believe you

You want to have a conversation about the valorization of “love”? Great — I hope you mean it.

[Crossposted to Pillowfort. Preview image by Tristan Chambers, licensed under CC BY-SA 2.0.]

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Gender Exploration Carnival – Roundup

This is the roundup for the June 2021 edition of the Gender Exploration Carnival, on the theme of “Sexuality.” View the Call for Submissions for more details.

This month, we received two submissions:

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Butchery

A post about short hair, big shirts, and half a dozen neuroses about feeling simultaneously drawn to and held back from the word “butch,” written for the Gender Exploration Carnival.

[Crossposted to Pillowfort. Preview image edited from a photo by Dano, licensed under CC BY 2.0.]

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A Modifier

This is not a direct discussion of the “are aces queer” question. This is a personal reflection piece about what else has bloomed out of it like a fungus, modifying my relationship to all orientation labels other than ace.

[Crossposted to Pillowfort. Preview image by OldTor, licensed under CC BY-NC-ND 2.0.]

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Gender Exploration Carnival – Call for Submissions: Sexuality

This is the Call for Submissions for the June 2021 iteration of the Gender Exploration Carnival. I’m this month’s host, and the theme for this month is Sexuality.

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Plato(nic) is A Problem

The word “platonic” is relatively popular in ace communities and other contexts, even though its meaning can be ambiguous, and most people don’t see an issue with that. Unfortunately one of my own chief associations with it is its namesake: Plato. Having had to read stuff by this guy for school, I’ve come to hate Plato, and my reasons for that aren’t as unrelated to the word “platonic” as you might like to think. It’s not something I usually talk about — but this month I decided the May 2021 Carnival of Aces was the perfect excuse.

Note: this post is an anti-Plato only zone. If you’re not interested in a bunch of bashing on the word “platonic,” don’t engage with this post.

[Crossposted to Pillowfort.]

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