Thinking about… making some kind of list of… examples of bad ace advice.  In part because, for me, at least, it’s sometimes easier to understand “don’t do the thing” when you’re also given concrete, contextual, real-life examples of someone doing the thing.  And in part because Queenie has taught me to love making linkspams.  I just wanna… collect… things, now…

But, given how most advice-style ace blog mods seem disinterested in receiving feedback… I’m not sure who the real audience would be.  I could write it for “people seeking ace advice,” of a kind of “buyer beware” bent, but I always get the impression that that’s not really a… consistent demographic of people who… have done even much 101-level reading, let alone pursue more advanced discussions.  I don’t think it would reach them, is what I’m saying.  It would reach a lot of people who don’t go to ace advice blogs when they need advice, instead.

So.  Hmm.

8 responses to “

  • Elizabeth

    Do it! :D

    You probably won’t get too many self-appointed advice bloggers bothering to read, but I know another audience who could really benefit from this kind of thing: therapists. Because you know, they’re going to see the same kinds of advice questions from ace clients, but they DON’T have any background in the ace community, so if they google this stuff, they’re not going to be able to tell the good advice from the bad advice.

    So… if you’d like to write this with therapists in mind, we can have it guest posted to RFAS. Does that sound good?

    And hey, if it seems too intimidating to write for that kind of audience, our writing team can work on this with you, and I’m sure my therapist would be very interested in reading and giving feedback on anything she doesn’t understand.

  • Silvermoon

    At the very least you might reach aces who talk to other aces offline, that aren’t so involved with keeping up with these discussions.

  • queenieofaces

    Yessss, join me in my corner of linkspams. Joooooooooooin.
    (I will say, though, posts where I’ve deconstructed other people’s problematic statements have wound up being…the hardest and most stress-provoking writing I’ve done. They also take me a REALLY long time. The Challenges Faced by Ace Survivors series took a good couple of months to write (I think 2 or 3? working on it every day?), and I think it’ll be 10 months from starting writing Ace Survivors as Rhetorical Devices to finishing posting it. Granted, I get the impression that I write much more slowly than you do, but, uh, just heads up, it could be a massive time sink, especially if you have any sort of anxiety about backlash.)

    • Coyote

      Oh, don’t worry, the reason I was thinking of doing this in the first place is because I already have several posts written up that fit the theme (like that one on Kiowa’s identity-policing). So I’m not too worried about it being labor intensive. But thanks, all the same. :)

  • Grey Wanders

    Such a resource could also be useful to organizations that want to be ace-friendly and competent but don’t really know how to be helpful. I’m thinking mostly of general queer organizations and clubs which may not have any asexual people in them yet, but want to be a resource for them.

    Also this is extremely off topic, but the way you’ve used ellipses in this post allows me to read it in a William Shatner voice in my head. I recommend trying it.

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